80’s Month: The Glass High Top: The deconstructed fairytales of Maid to Order and Pretty in Pink

Let’s face it, there’s only one major ensemble dramedy that dissects the high school experience and manages to be relevant even to this day – The Breakfast Club.  After the movie became a major hit, its two female leads were sent off on entirely dissimilar career paths:  while Ally Sheedy immediately took on adult roles in hits like St. Elmo’s Fire and Short Circuit, Molly Ringwald, much like her princessy character Claire, would end up stuck playing teenagers for five more years before testing the waters with The Pick Up Artist, Fresh Horses, and finally transitioning firmly into adult roles with Betsy’s Wedding in 1990.

The two would each take one more stab at trying to create classic films for teenagers; Ringwald would essay the role of poor teenager Andie Walsh in “Pretty in Pink” and Sheedy would play rich girl Jessica Montgomery in “Maid to Order” .  One would be a wild success, the other would be consigned to the one dollar cut-out bins across the country.  But why?  Let’s stack the classic against the unknown and see how – or if – they stack up.

CHARACTER APPEAL:   Our heroines could not come from two worlds more different.  While Andie’s a high school senior who’s so poor she has to make her own prom dress, Jessica’s a rich socialite who leans constantly on her father’s influence and good graces to get her out of whatever jam she’s gotten into. 

Both have their bad qualities.  While Jessica’s self-absorbed, mildly cruel and treats the hired help like crap, Andie’s an imperiously gawky wallflower.  Jessica has to learn to love the “help” that surround her, and Andie already loves her ever-loyal friend, Duckie.   Jessica must regain her glass slippers, while Andie simply has to make people believe in the beauty she already sees in herself, social divides be damned.  You’d think that Jessica would be the obvious choice, but she’s so harmlessly bitchy, it won’t be her you’re annoyed with by the end of the movie.

RESULT: TIE SCORE.

SIDE KICKS:  Andie has Duckie, the most well-remembered sidekick in any teen movie for the past ten years.  Jessica has Merry Clayton, famous background singer, which would normally be enough to put her over the top – unfortunately, I can’t recall what her character’s name is.

RESULT: Pretty In Pink

DREAMS: Jessica’s dream is simple: she wants to regain control of her life and return to the family fold. Andie’s dream is far simpler; she just wants to date a cool guy and change the false paradigums of her social class.  And if she has to wear a boyfriend jacket and a bucket hat, she’ll do it! 

Andie thinks globally, Jessica thinks locally.  And for that, Andie gets the duke.

RESULT: Pretty in Pink 2

Maid to Order  1

WORST PLOT ELEMENT:  I’m one of those traditionalists who thinks Duckie and Andie should’ve ended up together, and am bitter that she somehow ended up with Blaine because of focus groups.  On the other hand, Maid To Order’s worst plot element revolves around the supernatural edge that gives it its sole injection of uniqueness.     The very way it’s addressed opens up a huge plot hole because:

And it’s SPOILER time

Jessica’s fairy godmother, played by Beverly DeAngelo, actually follows her father’s bidding and causes Jessica’s downfall.  Fairy godparents are and should always be on the side of their charges, even though Jessica needs to learn a lesson.

It’s close.  Really close.  But I have to give it to Maid to Order.  At least they stuck to their (formulaic and sitcom-like) guns and delivered their intended ending – even if it was crafted in a boardroom.

RESULT: Pretty In Pink 2

Maid To Order: 2

WORST FASHION MOMENT:

…Yeah, I’ve gotta give it to Andie.

RESULT: Pretty In Pink 3

Maid to Order 2  And a college credit course to whoever was doing Ally Sheedy’s hair in the 80’s.

BEST USE OF THE CINDERELLA MYTHOS: And here’s the meat and potatoes of our piece: which makes better use of the Cinderella mythos? 

It’s all about the straight telling versus the re-imagining.   Jessica goes from riches to rags to riches again; Andie never gets richer, but she successfully crosses the class lines and wins Blaine’s heart, at least for the duration of the dance.    Both are worthy of their crowns – in their own ways.

RESULT: Pretty In Pink: 3

Maid to Order: 3

So in the end, it’s a draw!  Both movies have their good and bad points, and both will give you a solid afternoon of 80’s cheesetertainment.